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I’m a Spartan. A proud MSU graduate who spent four years in East Lansing which were some of the best years of my life. I know some of you reading this already know that, but for those who don’t, I just like to get that out in the open so you can take that into consideration when reading my shit.

As a Spartan fan, this year sucks. And that’s probably as mildly as I could put it. What makes it suck even more is that the worse it gets for MSU, the inverse is happening for U of M.

Rivalries ebb and flow. Sometimes it’s back and forth. Sometimes it’s complete domination. And sometimes your rival is all the way at the top of the top while your program is below the basement floor- and that’s what we’re dealing with Saturday.

Michigan (7-0), ranked #2 in the nation, one year removed from their playoff birth, heads into East Lansing to take on MSU, who’s coach was terminated this year for jerking it on the phone to university vendor and just blew 24-6 lead versus a less-than-formidable Rutgers team last Saturday to fall to 2-4.

I love my Spartans. I believe in my Spartans 99.9% of the time. But the line on this game is currently sitting at -24.5 points and I’m not touching it with a 10-foot pole. Yeah sure, you can look at the COVID year and say… “the last time Michigan was a 24-point favorite look what happened!” Stop that. This is a completely different situation.

Look, I hate Michigan. Of all the rivals in my life, Blackhawks, Avalanche, Packers, Bears, you name it- the Michigan Wolverines are public enemy #1. But I also like to consider myself a reasonable sports fan, and right now, we don’t even have one leg on which to stand. We don’t have a candle’s-worth of a spark. We got blown out last year, started a tunnel fight which resulted in court cases while having committed 90+ million dollars to a coach who is already out the door for breeching his contract.

Everything about being an MSU football fan sucks to the extreme right now.

As the teams prepare to meet for the first time since the tunnel altercation, fans are understandably wary of another incident. In July, a Detroit radio host cautioned Michigan fans to stay away from Spartan Stadium or risk “eating a battery.” The game will be played at night, which tends to encourage a rowdier crowd. It also will be the first Michigan-Michigan State game since the passage of a state law that allows schools to serve alcohol at sporting events. (The Athletic)

And now you have one of the more established Spartan media voices in Mike Valenti (the radio host mentioned above) telling Michigan fans they might eat a battery if they come to Spartan stadium?

WHAT?

I understand having pride in your program, believing they can hang with a better team, but telling opposing fans, fans of a program running on all cylinders, not come to the game because the fans of our shitty 2-4 interim coached team and directionless program are gonna feed you batteries is ASININE. (Yes, I know he said this in July before all the Tuck stuff went down, but its still a completely unnecessary flame to toss on an already overly-toxic rivalry).

State is gonna lose this game 56-10.

MSU is debuting their black jerseys. Which means they are essentially wearing black to their own funeral this weekend.

Spartans fans- this weekend, wear your green and white. Proudly rep your colors. Stand by the university you know and love. But prepare to take it on the chin. And by “on the chin” I mean there isn’t an orifice that won’t be violated by our deep-rooted rivals on Saturday.

Ebbs and flows.

Go Green.

🍾

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