Burger King’s marketing and temporary menu items are borderline insane. I said it in my review of the Impossible Whopper last week, and right on cue, Burger King ups the ante on me less than a week later by introducing a marketing campaign centered around, you guessed it….. farts. Cow farts to be exact. I caught wind of this approach today on twitter when I came across this tweet.

Now immediately like any functioning human with a brain who is mildly plugged into the internet, I assumed Burger King’s account got hacked. But then when I looked closer and saw the tweet was posted 15+ hours ago, I knew something smelled funny. So I dove in. I quickly discovered not only was this fart tweet not a result of a BK handle hacking but it was actually part of a much larger, encompassing marketing campaign that BK has gone all in on. Brace for impact.

That’s literally a full two minute song dedicated to cow farts and how BK is feeding their cows some sort of lemon grass or some shit to limit green house gases that affect climate change. The child sounding country song features a wanna-be Walmart yodeling kid (or maybe that is him, I am not 100% sure and not looking into it), cow fart imagery, and young children singing and sauntering their way through the esophagus and digestive system of a cow.

Now look- I get what they’re doing. They think they’re doing the right thing, the end of the song even says we’re part of the problem so we’re becoming part of the solution. But who in God’s name thought this approach would be a good idea? Who in the marketing brainstorm said-

“hey you know what we need people to think of when they think Burger King…FARTS. That’ll get the people to want to come eat our shitty fast food burgers. If our horrible service and dog shit menu items don’t get people to want to come to the King, we’ll definitely draw them in with our cow flatulence campaign. Hook, line, and sinker.” 

And they are REALLY leaning into this.

They are literally internet farting to any sad sad soul that requests it. This makes zero fucking sense to me. I guess any press is good press and here I am writing an entire article dedicated to the campaign so maybe it’s working, but I also know/have seen quite a few people who have sworn to never eat BK again due to this ASSinine campaign.

Additionally, I just don’t know that the BK crowd gives a shit about this stuff. I think that BK is doing this is great and all. But just like do it and write a press release, you don’t need to paid sponsor it across twitter and have a literal song and dance tied to cows blowing fucking farts. YOU ARE A FOOD SERVICE. YOU SELL FOOD TO HUMANS. WHY WOULD ASSOCIATE YOUR BRAND WITH FARTS? That’s gotta be marketing 101 right? Page one- food and farts/shit bodily functions/excretions do not mix…k, cool? Next lesson.

BK people don’t care about green house gases and climate change. You’re Burger King, not Beyond Juice. I’m not saying don’t make changes for the good of the globe but get Mason Ramsey walking out of a smoking cows metaphorical asshole off my timeline. Let me chomp your Whoppers (Impossible or real) and have me immediately regret it in peace. I don’t need to think about buttholes in the midst of my already poor decision.

I will reiterate again- Burger King’s marketing is so fucking weird and off the wall. And a lot of these temporary menu items they come out with make absolutely ZERO sense. Let’s take a quick walk down memory lane.

They’ve done dogs. Weird!

Tacos. Yuck!

Whatever the fuck this is!

Scary stuff. The day BK got rid of the King was the day BK marketing died. Never forget him catching a TD vs the Leo’s.

And if you have’t seen my Impossible Whopper review, check it out here:

– Frank