This article is in regards to last week’s game on 1/17/2019

Now look- This article is 5 days late. I understand that. I intended to write this on Friday morning but due to utter disgust with the outcome of the game combined with lack of desire to write another losing article, I did not write a Longneck update from last week’s game. Selfish and unacceptable. I apologize. But here it is, in all of it’s frustrating, losing culture’s glory.

The Necks were playing the Michigan Mallards. One of the leagues better teams. The Necks had won the previous week vs one of the shittier teams in the league, The Mustangs, 5-3. The Longnecks, looking for their first back-to-back wins since November, entered Thursday night’s game inspired. But as usual the opposing team, in this case the Mallards, would strike first. 1-0. But, uncharacteristically, the Necks would strike back the very necks shift, with the pipin’ hot Hoon burying his 3rd goal in 2 games. All square at 1.

It should be noted, that for this game the Necks had the same refereeing core that reffed the most penalized game in Necks history, which resulted in 4 games worth of suspensions. And just like last time, these complete losers whipped up another dog shit officiating performance, but at least this time they were dog shit on both sides of the puck. Seriously, I didn’t think I could lose anymore respect for these piss poor refs, but when you’re a complete idiot, truly a moron through and through- nothing is impossible. So it goes without saying there were some horrible penalties, disallowed goals, missed offsides…the whole nine yards. The most furiously entertaining aspect of the whole charade though is one of the refs acts like it’s game 7 of the Stanley Cup finals whenever he calls a penalty, and gets into the call like he’s mic’d up or something. He was yelling and leaning into calls when passing the news over the scorekeeper.

“NUMBER 4, 2 MINUTES SLASH”

Loser. Whatever you just needed to know that.

This score would remain that way until later in the 2nd period in a game that was fairly back and forth. After a missed break-away, and roughly 4 other super great scoring chances that anyone with even just a little bit more skill would have converted on, Frank finally found the back of the net…on some wild turn around blind shot that caught everyone off guard. 2-1 Necks.

This had to be the Necks first second period lead since November. And we were able to hold this lead, all the way down until the final 4 minutes of the third. This is where the wheels start to get rickety. With about 4:30 left in the game, the Mallards tied the game on some pass in front or some shit. Idk. Who cares. Tied 2-2.

Following the goal, there is a faceoff at center ice, because that’s what you do. This Mallards guy must have typed in some type of cheat code cause he won the draw forward, went around the center, split both our D, then drove the puck and himself into the back of the net. It was truly incredible/demoralizing.

From there the Necks are now down 3-2 with about 4 minutes left, we promptly take some really shitty ticky tack dog shit penalty and the wheels fall completely off. Mallards score like 7 seconds into the power play. 4-2. Then with 2 minutes left bury an empty netter to seal the deal 5-2. We just let the clock run out. It was disgusting.

The locker room afterwords was silent for a little bit. No one could truly believe how bad we’ve become. Our record is now 4-11-2, after only losing like 5 games the year before.

We suck! But as always, we were in good spirits and still believe we can win the championship, which is pretty crazy to think but I don’t care I’ll keep hashtagging #championshiporbust until the cows/giraffes come home. You wanna know what’s crazy? Here are the standings, and we are not in last. The team we played and lost 5-2 with a 2-1 lead with 4 left is in first. We’ve hung with a lot of these teams so fuck off if you don’t believe in the Necks. Everyone makes the playoffs and we’re winning this god damn thing.

Sure we’re 1-4 in our last 5 and have the least amount of goals by a margin of 12, but I still believe. We’ll be ready come playoffs.

Tonight, we play Brighton-Chrysler, who won the championship last year…but we also beat them last time we played.

Game Notes:

No game notes I’m over this game.

#SYNO 🦒 🍾

– Frank