It’s officially that time of year for me. The ‘fuck betting on football’ week of the year. As many, MANY, of you have pointed out, I haven’t had the greatest run of picking games this year. I have even lost count as to what my record is. And this week, even before Sunday, has been the ultimate kick in the teeth.

I had Seahawks straight up -3 Thursday which was great, but I got greedy and teased them +4.5 with an over of 49.5…. final in that one was 28-21 = 49….with Seattle’s kicker missing an extra point.

Yesterday was the gun-in-my-mouth special, with Cincy Bearcats winning 36-33 over UCF and not covering a -4 spread by their running back pulling up short of a clear cut touchdown and essentially taking a knee on the 1 yard line and letting time expire.

Then the grand finale was the over in the Oklahoma-Oklahoma State Game where I had the over of 60, OK State proceeded to score 0 second half points and had four plays from the Sooners’ 2 yard line and couldn’t score as time expired…final 41-13 = 54.

So I’m Jack Frost. Mr. Freeze. The Abominable Snowman. And I’m pissed off. Odds favor me hitting at least ONE of those bets, but as 2020 trudges on, so does my nightmarish betting history. That’s why you’d probably be wise to fade everything I’m about to say.

PITTSBURGH -9.5 (-130) @ Jacksonville, 1pm: Old faithful. I don’t care. This is the only team I have hit with any consistency this year and I’m sticking to them. Jake Luton the rookie-sixth-round-draft-pick gets his third start and hasn’t looked bad in his first two. He was playing against some bottom of the barrel pass rushes in Green Bay and Houston. This week he gets the unbeaten Steelers who have the best pass rush in the NFL. Steelers cover or I take an afternoon swan dive onto I-94. Final: Steelers 31, Jacksonville 13

TENNESSEE +6 @ Baltimore, 1pm: This pick is completely unorthodox for me but it’s what I need to start doing. A degenerate of mine who is way better than me at this said to me recently “you need to start betting what makes you uncomfortable.” So I’m working on that and this is my valiant attempt in week 11 to try this. It’s a ‘big’ underdog, versus a good team, on the road. Everything in my normal betting brain screams take Baltimore, but I’m going the unconventional route and thinking 6 points is enough for the Titans to keep it close. They had the juice versus the Ravens in the playoffs last year, we’ll see if they can at least keep it close a year later. Final: Baltimore 27, Tennessee 24. 

GREEN BAY +1.5 @ Indy, 4:30pm: Indy has a great defense, there is no denying that. But I think everyone is just a little too hot under the collar over Indy, I don’t believe they are as good as everyone thinks. And for as good as Indy’s D may be, Rodgers is equally as good at finding a way to win, and I think that’s exactly what he’s able to do in an empty dome in Indianapolis. Rivers is still, and forever very sus and I think the Pack D forces enough stops and turnovers in this one to get the win. Final: Packers 24, Indy 23 

Teaser of the Week: 

Let’s keep this short.and.simple. KANSAS CITY PK with STEELERS -3. Two great teams, versus two lesser teams getting 7.5 points in a teaser. Done. Don’t care I already picked Steelers above. This is the bet. Take it. Don’t think about it. Goodnight.

OUR LIONS 🥴😎😑🤠🥳😏🤢😍

Where and how do we even big to attempt to pick this one? One thing I’ve always said about the Lions is that they are the most sickening team to follow because every year they concoct a new, creative, fucked-up, sick way to twist and squeeze your heart, mind, and soul until you have nothing left to give.

Nothing is different this year. The boys sit at 4-5 and have lost games on the final play, won games on the final play, won games they should have lost and lost games they should have won. I have written them off multiple times, and drank the Kool-Aid just as much as I’ve thrown them in the trash. Last week I said they would lose and the Patricia era would finally come to an end. Which was a careless pipe-dream of a pick by me because I should have known that the Lions being the Lions would win that game and swing them from bottom dweller to “IN THE HUNT” just to string us out a little longer. Now look at us. We have a chance to play a banged-up, less-than-stellar Carolina team this week, with a chance to play a reeling Chicago team on Thanksgiving and jump them in the standings. It’s truly incredible.

 

(Bears are currently 5-5)

So as a fan, how can I sit here and say, yeah, Leo’s lose this week. Deep-down, even though this team drives me absolutely insane and will do whatever the opposite is of what I pick….I want the 5-5 Bears-Lions showdown on Thanksgiving. I need it. Lions are missing Golladay, Swift, Amendola and Staff is banged up. They are on the road. Everything in this game points to an absolute let down. And part of me wants to pick a let-down because that surely means they will win. But the slappy in me has taken over this week, like Venom took over Eddie Brock. I am picking the Lions to gut this one out behind an MVP-like performance out of Matthew Stafford and 100+ yards out of Adrian Peterson. Final: Lions 25, Panthers 23. 

Shoot me.

#forward 🍾

– Frank